The Weird Wall Post

S has a Crazy Aunt. Well, more like 2 crazy aunts, but I've met the other crazy aunt at our wedding & have talked with her several times. On further reflection, there's a third crazy aunt who is a nun and has dementia, but for the purpose of this post we'll say he only has 1 Crazy Aunt.

Crazy Aunt has a Facebook account. I have never met Crazy Aunt. I have never even talked to Crazy Aunt. We've been married for 10+ years, dated another 2 years, so that's 12 years of not talking to Crazy Aunt. But she friend'ed me on Facebook, so that's like being BFFs, right?

In addition to not talking to Crazy Aunt, we haven't talked to her two boys (S's cousins) in that same amount of time. I talk with one of the wives, but I've never talked with the actual cousins. Of course, the other cousin married a Crazy Lady (perhaps trying to mimic his mother), and - surprise, surprise - Crazy Aunt and Crazy Lady never got along. For the past 12 years, the family gossip mill has talked all about Crazy Lady (who I also never met) and how despicable she is. Cousin and Crazy Lady had 2 kids together, and one of them filed for divorce from the other last year. S's family isn't very exciting, so this is Big News.

Anyway, I get this wall post from Crazy Aunt yesterday. She's "friends" with my husband, but apparently I rate the wall post instead of him.

"Hello, Just an update. I enjoy reading about you and the family. J e f f,G r a c e,J a n e n e and D a r r e n are going to be in S e a t t l e on Friday , July 29th. They leave for A l a s k a on Sat. Maybe you all can get together for drinks or something. Happy Belated birthday to Julia. How did she gert to be 2 yrs.old so soon?Love, ___"

J e f f is the cousin who was married to Crazy Lady. G r a c e is his daughter. Not sure why his son isn't going on the trip. Not completely sure who J a n e n e is. Maybe a new girlfriend? I saw a picture from cousin-in-law's photo album of J e f f with someone who had a Kate Gosselin haircut, ya know the cut that was long in front and spiky in back. I really didn't know anyone actually asked for the Kate Gosselin haircut. Ew, it was scary. The family gossip mill says that this chick lives with her mother and is 40ish and doesn't work. If Kate Gosselin is this chick's role model and she still lives with her parents, then obviously we will get along famously!!!!! Who the eff is D a r r e n? Kate Gosselin Wannabe's son???? Did they rename J e f f's boy after the divorce? I have no clue.

If J e f f wants to contact us to meet, can't he do it all on his own? Must he have his mother meddle in his affairs at the tender age of 40? The family gossip mill has also said that Crazy Aunt is paying for J e f f's mortgage and living expenses since Crazy Lady took all he had in his divorce. Okay, then why are you going on a cruise, Dude, if Mommy has to pay your living expenses? If my mom was paying my living expenses at the age of 40, I sure as heck wouldn't be going on a cruise.

Crazy Aunt posted something similar onto the wall of my BIL who lives an hour away. He's the one with the crazy wife, the one who called the police on my ILs last month. I was laughing my head off at what she posted on his wall: "Love you and the boys." Ha ha ha, no mention of his wife deliberately!

So I sit here and wonder how to respond to her. I have no contact info for J e f f other than snail mail. We've never contacted each other at all previously. I'm not really interested in driving up to S e a t t l e to meet Kate Gosselin Wannabe, if that's even who that name is referring to. The whole thing (divorce in late 2009, new girl whose role model is Kate Gosselin, taking a cruise when Mommy is paying for your living expenses...) is just kind of odd, and then there's Mommy trying to get you a double date thing....

Weird, weird, weird.