Sunday, October 31, 2010

Halloween Recap

Our Halloween festivities began last Friday the 22nd.  Julia had a "harvest party" (Halloween party but thou must not use the term Halloween) at school.  That was also the day she was puking.  Yeah, we should have kept her home, but you do realize my Halloween fervor, right?  She was not very into it, but she posed for a few ladybug pictures.  Out of the all the things at the Halloween party (errrr...harvest party), she enjoyed when we took off her warm ladybug costume and let her play with balloons in the disco room. 

Fast forward to this past Friday (the 29th).  The community center down the street was having a Halloween celebration.  Since it was going to be inside and we had learned that the ladybug costume was too HOT for inside, we put her in her pumpkin costume from last year.  She was feeling better, but the place was crowded and overwhelming.  So we were there about 10 minutes.  She did end up with at least 12 granola bars and some fruit leather, so she got some healthy treats. 

On Saturday night I thought we might to a different community event, but we just ended up hanging out at home. 

On Sunday since we were going to trick or treat, we thought the ladybug costume would be more appropriate because she'd be outside & it's thicker.  Now this is the first Halloween in our new house.  I bought about 5 bags of candy in the past few weeks, hubby was going to stay behind (Sounders game) and hand out candy.  I was going to take Julia with her friend and my friends to go trick or treating. 

Remember how I posted a few weeks ago that I've been running in the Stepford neighborhood?  The entrance to the neighborhood is about 1/3 mile away.  It's flat terrain there.  The houses are really close together.  They really seemed to decorate well.  Well, the place was packed.  Cars lined EVERY street.  There were people everywhere.  There's about 10 kids on every doorstep at any one time.  It was flipping nuts.  Our old neighborhood was pretty active, and yeah some people shuttled kids in.  But in the Stepford neighborhood, it was 20x worse!  There were so many people that it really wasn't fun.  People were expecting tons of people, so they gave out the icky candy too. 

We headed out there fairly quickly and went back into my neighborhood.  MUCH better candy, less crowded, a whole lot nicer (except all of those pesky stairs given the challenging terrain).  I called hubby, and he said there were ZERO trick or treaters.  How sad! 

After our friends left, we went to about 5 more houses.  Yummy candy, full size candy bars + mini bars at the same house, and one lady gave Julia her own real pumpkin.  (Guess who took the pumpkin to bed with her?)

I'm kinda bummed that no one came to our house.  :(  This neighborhood has a whole different feel than our old neighborhood.  Our street doesn't seem all that friendly, which sucks. 

Julia had a great time and enjoyed the experience!  Plus, with all of our practice in the past week with the harvest party and the community event, she was really comfortable in costume tonight. 

Happy Halloween

Mood:  melancholy, which is very appropriate for Halloween.

I do adore Halloween.  If you know me, you know that I love candy.  That's obvious reason #1.  The less obvious reason is that I am goth to a certain extent, so the mood of the day is certainly up my alley. 

Exercise goal reached for October.  I did 3 hours of running.  Still don't like running, I ended up gaining weight this month, so I can't even use the argument that running sucks but at least I lose weight when I do it.  Eh, my 2010 running trial didn't work out, just like my 2009 trial.  Hey, I tried.  Back to doing exercise that I enjoy!

I have a few deeper posts in my head but am having trouble crafting them.  Soon, soon.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Seventh Batch of Dewey Entries

Making My Way Through Dewey

00_
011.73      Pearl, Nancy.  Book Lust.
020           Johnston, Marilyn.  This Book Is Overdue.
031.02        Frauenfelder, Mark.  The World's Worst.
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051           Fraterrigo, Elizabeth. Playboy and the Making of the Good Life in Modern America.
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081               Rakoff, David. Don't Get Too Comfortable.
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121.63    Berger, Peter and Anton Zijderveld.  In Praise of Doubt.
133        Horn, Stacy.  Unbelievable.
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153.83   Welch, Suzy.  10-10-10.
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177.7    Stone, Deborah.  The Samaritan's Dilemma.
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248.845             Neumann, Connie. Parenting in the Home Stretch.
255.1                Okholm, Dennis.  Monk Habits for Everyday People.
261.850973     Zacharias, Karen Spears. Will Jesus Buy Me a Double-Wide?
277.3083         Meyers, Robin.  Why the Christian Right Is Wrong.
289.3082          Solomon, Dorothy Allred.  The Sisterhood.
299.94               Russo, Steve.  What's the Deal with Wicca?
302.34082           Paul, Marla.  The Friendship Crisis.
305.4092             Merrill, Wendy.  Falling into Manholes.
310                      Statistical Abstract of the United States: 2009.
327.73009            Dobbs, Lou. Exporting America.
332.02401            Epperson, Sharon.  The Big Payoff.
343.730523         Lange, James. Retire Secure.
352.480973        Rivlin, Alice and Isabel Sawhill. Restoring Fiscal Sanity.
362.196852        Schaefer, Jenni.  Goodbye Ed, Hello Me.
378.19822           Peril, Lynn.  College Girls.
381.120973        Mitchell, Stacy.  Big Box Swindle.
392.6                  Shapiro, Bill.  Other People's Love Letters.
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608    Cooper, Christopher.  Patently Absurd.
612     McCardle, William D, Frank I. Katch, Victor L. Katch.  Essentials of Exercise Physiology.
621.38456  Baig, Edward C.  iPhone for Dummies.
636.7527  Koontz, Dean.  A Big Little Life: A Memoir of a Joyful Dog.
641.58      Hall, Dawn.  Busy People's Slow Cooker Cookbook.
658.812     Price, Bill and David Jaffe.  The Best Service Is No Service.   
663.61      Gleick, Peter H. Bottled & Sold: The Story Behind Our Obsession with Bottled Water.
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750.11        Richardson, Joy.  Looking at Pictures.
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771.33         Revell, Jeff.  Nikon D5000: From Snapshots to Great Shots.
782.421649  McQuillar, Tayannah Lee.  When Rap Music Had a Conscience.  
794.000     Orbanes, Philip E. Monopoly: The World's Most Famous Game.
80_
817.000 Scottoline, Lisa. Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog.
828.92    Browning, Guy.  Never Hit a Jellyfish with a Spade.
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910.4     Leffel, Tim.  Make Your Travel Dollars Worth a Fortune.
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937       Nardo, Don.  Life of a Roman Slave.
940.21   Netzley, Patricia D.  Life During the Renaissance.
956.7044  Life.  Last Letters Home.
96_
973.92      Strauss, William and Elaina Newport.  Sixteen Scandals.
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Friday, October 29, 2010

More Letters

As part of the Dewey project, I forced myself to read something in the military section.  You see, I'm not really a military person.  It's one of those subjects that I don't really like.  Based on how I'm filling out Dewey, you can see where my interests lie.  There are some huge gaps, and I'm trying to work on them.  That's the main reason for doing this project. 

Both of my parents were/are in the military.  My dad was.  I don't know what his rank was.  I don't know if he was discharged honorably, dishonorably, or what.  There were many things that were talked about in my dad's family and an equal number of things that weren't talked about.  For the record, the Worldwide Wrestling Federation was talked about.  Anything that would be put on a resume was not talked about. 

My mom's a lieutenant colonel.  I don't know how the rankings go (because, as I said, I don't care to learn about this topic that much), but numerous people have told me this is a very high ranking.  Whenever I went with her in her uniform on base, practically everyone salutes her.  I never knew it was because of her rank; I just thought it was a gender thing. 

My mother is very quiet about her military service.  She's not the type to brag or complain or be passionate about her beliefs outwardly.  The military was a means to an end for her.  The end would be education.  Her mom was a housekeeper, and her dad was a gardener and then became a steelworker.  They didn't have the money to send her to college.  She joined to get her education paid for. Once her education was paid for, she had been in for quite a while, and then she just had to get another 10 years in to be eligible for the military retirement.  So she stayed in to get that.  Again, a means to an end.

Being that she was a lieutenant colonel and I had good grades and good SAT scores, I got heavily recruited by West Point.  As the calls and propaganda starting to pile up, I eventually asked her about this West Point thing.  Should I apply since it seemed like a given that I'd be accepted?  The gist of what she said was that I wasn't cut out for the military, and I'd get most of my schooling paid with the money she and my aunt put in a trust so unless I was really interested it probably wasn't worth it.  Which was fine because she was right, I was not interested in a life in the military at all.  Nothing about it interested me.  Some girls are attracted to guys in the military.  I was not.  The few that I had talked to weren't my type, and we had very different mindsets and personalities.  Not that I want to be with someone who shares my same exact mindset, but somewhere in the general vicinity would probably be good.  

I know zilch about the military.  Given that both of my parents were/are in the military, I should be ashamed.  And I am.  I should know more about the inner workings of our military than I do.  Those brave souls fight for our freedom.  While I may disagree with the direction our country has been headed while George W. Bush was President, I thank the people who defend our country so tirelessly and who give up time with their families to go overseas.  It's got to be one of the toughest jobs in the world.

The book I selected for the Dewey project was Last Letters Home.   It showed letters from soldiers who died in Iraq to their families during 2003-04.  It was such a sad book on so many levels.  Yes, I completely disagreed with the Iraq thing.  Saddam was an awful person, but he wasn't the cause of the terrorist attacks.  Then to go into Iraq and cause that upheaval and all those lost lives...eh, I'm not going to get on my soapbox, you can see where I would go if I had more energy to focus on that aspect.  It was so interesting to hear biographies on these brave souls who were too young to die.  It was touching to see their actual letters and words to their families.  To be put in such a raw situation like that and see how people reach out to those they care about.  And to see some of their last words before death.  It was sad how many times they'd write an e-mail or letter and be in a bombing a few hours later.  Awful, tragic stuff.  And inspiring at the same time. 

These are the moments where I reflect on the topic at hand and learn more about others and vicariously, myself.  I am definitely liking this aspect of the Dewey project. 

Thursday, October 28, 2010

October Financial Rundown

Thus far this month: $325 on groceries - this is about what it always is.  I might spend another $25 this weekend, so we'll say $350 for the entire month.  I find it difficult to get under $300 without a huge amount of coupon clipping and running around.  I don't mind coupon clipping if I have a newspaper.  But I object to going through a zillion hoops and entering your e-mail everywhere and liking stuff on Facebook just to get $1 off.  Yes, I'm lazy.  We spent $33 on dining out this month.  So $380ish total on food.  Eh, not too bad.

Let's see, I did that Bill Pay experiment with our City utility bill.  I didn't really like that.  I paid it on 10/8 through my bank's Bill Pay (money comes out right away from your checking account), and it didn't get credited at the utility company until 10/14.  I don't like giving Chase that kind of float to earn interest on my money.  And I felt like I had to babysit the transaction.

We had been signed up for auto debit for our three main utility accounts.  We still are, but I made online accounts at the three utilities and did a sample payment by ACH at each one.  All three of those went seamlessly.  Even though it's a pain to have yet another login, I think I like this method of payment the best.  What is really nice is that I can pay a flat amount of whatever I want at anytime, so I have a credit right now at the gas company and with the City.  And with AT&T.  I like that control.

Yay for paying online at each utility website!  Nay for Bill Pay!  If Bill Pay works for you, that's great.  I can see that it is easier than logging in to each of your accounts individually.  I suppose I don't have that much faith in the Bill Pay process, however, and I don't really like Chase getting the float.  As a matter of personal preference, I don't think I'll do many more Bill Pay transactions.

We refinanced this month.  I'm still waiting to get my Welcome Packet in the mail from the credit union so I can login there and make ACH payments on their website.  I wanna be welcomed (and get access)!!! 

All told, it was a good financial month.  I had predicted that this month would be tight.  It wasn't as tight as I expected, but thankfully nothing unexpected happened, and we ended up not needing to bring cash to closing.  That was nice.

November is a light expense month.  We won't be getting our biggest utility bill, as that bill is every other month.  No mortgage payment since we refinanced.  And I paid ahead on most of the other utility bills with my ACH experiments at each of their websites.  Oh yeah, and I already paid for November and December daycare.  Sooooo, we really only have to pay for food and other miscelleneous spending.  This hopefully will give us some padding for December expenses. Not that Christmas should be that expensive, but it's more that those annual bills hit us in December.  

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Sick Day

Yesterday I thought I was going to pass out at work.  Feverish, runny nose, running on empty.  I woke up still not feeling well, so I thought I'd take a sick day.  Lay in bed, zone in and out, read, cuddle with my pillow, doesn't that sound like a little slice of heaven? 

I kind of thought I'd take a nap.  After all, it is what I do really, really well.  For some reason, I can't sleep.  I've been in bed all day long, and sleep continues to elude me.  So I'm sitting here watching the rain, and I watched a bit of TV.  I don't really watch much TV at all.  We canceled cable a month ago, so now I can't really watch TV even if I wanted to.  We kept the box, so there's a few things on demand.  Again, not a lot.  I could watch Hulu, but for some reason I haven't fully adjusted to watching TV on a computer.

I watched THREE Lifetime movies today.  How pathetic is that?

"Reviving Ophelia" - They say this is based on a book which I've read.  Ummm, no.  This is the 2010 version of the Fred Savage / Candace Cameron Lifetime movie from the early 1990s.  Remember Fred beating up DJ in that after school special?  Add some cell phones and different actors, and you've got the 2010 version. 

"Homecoming" - I suppose Mischa Barton's career is well on its downward spiral since she's in Lifetime movies now.  Ever seen "Misery"?  Remember Kathy Bates holding that poor dude hostage?  Mischa Barton plays psycho ex girlfriend who is keeping the new girlfriend hostage in much of the same ways that Kathy Bates did.  But when Mischa Barton holds a hatchet, I'm a little less frightened and just want to laugh. 

And finally "The Haunting of Sorority Row."  Don't know what to make of this one.  It was occult-y in a sorority - I suppose the title says it all.  Probably appropriate in their line-up since it is getting close to Halloween.  I just find it hard to believe that if you're almost - but not quite - dead that your body can take a different physical form while you come back and avenge your death. 

Now to try very hard to get a small nap in.

Monday, October 25, 2010

What's in the Purse

This blog exercise was all the rage a few months ago.  On the surface, it never seemed very interesting to me.  But it actually is pretty insightful.

The premise is to show the contents of your purse.  I know, pretty boring.  That's what I thought too.  But hey, I have to admit I was curious about what others carried around all day.  Since I used my phone to take pictures, that is omitted from the pictures.  But I've shown a picture of my phone before.

Here we go.  First off, my purse.  $20 on sale at JC Penney.  Yeah, what does that say about me?



Probably self-explanatory, including my one fetish.  From the left, my wallet.  My brush.  My shopping card chain.  I have 4 keys and 6 shopping cards, so with the 6:4 advantage, it is a shopping card chain.  9 freaking pens!!!  Yes, I'm a pen klepto.  I have severe pen issues.  Now you know my dirty little secret - I can't be trusted alone with pens.  You can't see it from the picture, but if the pen has a cap, I gnaw on it.  As for pencils in grade school, I chewed all the way through to the lead.  I'm glad that typing took off the way it did, or I might have ingested a whole tree by now.  The purple thing on the right is my coupon organizer.

Close up of the internal goings-on of my wallet:



More crap in my purse:


From the left:

My work key card - yes, that's a picture of my main man Mr. Smith on it.  My iPhone cords.  2 more pens, not to be confused with the other 9 in the other picture plus the 1 in my wallet.  Grand total = 12 pens in my purse.  Victoria's Secret and Bath & Body Works coupons. Hand sanitizer. Body Shop strawberry lip gloss, Bath & Body Works Fruit Punch lip gloss.  Jump drive. Spa gift certificate. Little wallet thing with pictures and infrequently used membership cards (like voter ID, Blockbuster, etc.). Some receipts.

And that's that.  I'm pretty boring, aren't I, except for the pen addiction?

Sunday, October 24, 2010

A decade

It's an anniversary today for me.  I've worked with the same employer for a decade now.  A decade. 10 years.  Wow.

So I started there when I was 22, and I'm now 32.  I know the passage of 10 years might not seem that long, but it's massive when you look at the ten years between 12 and 22 years old.  Back when I was 12, I was in 7th grade in Las Vegas.  My main responsibility was remembering my locker combination.  10 years zoom by, and at 22 years old I was married, owned a home, and started a full-time job at my employer.  The passage of those ten years encapsulated junior high, moving to a different state, high school, college, and reaching milestones for dating, voting, driving, and drinking.

Of course the last 10 years haven't been as change-filled for me other than becoming a parent.  But it's weird to think that in the 10 years I've been working there, other people in this world were 12 years old (children) when I started and now are 22 years old (full-fledged adults).  I've seen co-workers' kids grow up in the blink of an eye, seeing them go through tragedy, marriage/divorce, retirement, etc.

I think of that sitcom The Wonder Years that premiered in 1989.  It was set 20 years prior, so the opening show was from 1969.  It's hard to acknowledge that the show could appear in 2009 and be set back in 1989, and I would remember everything it talked about.  At the time that I watched the show, the 1960s seemed SO long ago and I couldn't fathom living in a time that was so different.  Of course the big intent with the show was that being a teenager was still being a teenager regardless of the time period.  Yeah, teenagers today have all those technology gadgets that weren't around or as popular way back when, but their feelings and emotions are much like that those teenagers in the 80s or even the 60s.

I see I've departed from my 10th anniversary work post.  Back on track, Ms. Blog Author. I never imagined that I would be working in the same place now when I started 10 years ago.  Having never even lived somewhere for more than a handful of years, I couldn't comprehend actually working in the same place for a decade.  On the plus side, I've learned a lot and had up to 10 years of friendships with people that I would have not otherwise had.  I do wonder if there were opportunities I have missed out on career-wise by sticking with the same employer.  I'm pretty sure I have, but those opportunities would have had corresponding negative attributes - that I am sure of.   Who knows what the next work decade will hold?  I may be laid off and have to change fields, I may choose to change fields willingly, or I may stay put.  It's hard to predict now how things will pan out, but for what it's worth, it's been awesome to have a certain steadiness to my life in the past 10 years and to work for a great organization full of great people.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Worst Job Ever?


There was a discussion question that asked you to recollect your worst job.  As cranky as I am, I don’t really have a job that rings out and sings, “I was a horrible job.”  For the most part, I do enjoy working.  Left to my own devices, as I’ve said before, I get into trouble and/or do stupid things.  Thus, being productive and being paid for being productive are two very nice things that keep me on the somewhat straight and narrow. 

I left one job after three months, but it wasn’t so much that I hated the job.  It was more that I hated the company.  They were involved in subprime financing, and I felt they weren’t ethical and took advantage of people.  Capitalism is fine and dandy until you charge people the equivalent of a 100% interest rate for the privilege of being lent an extremely small sum.  They sucked.  However, I did quite well at the job, so I won’t nominate that one as worst job. 

Probably my worst actual job was working at a gynecologist office.  Why oh why did I apply there?  I’m not terribly fond of women in general, and doctors and bodily fluids give me the heebie jeebies.   I was in high school, and they were looking for someone in the afternoon hours.  I was bored, wanted another job since my first job was only 8-10 hours per week, and it turned out that my boss at M e r r I l l   L y n c h was a patient there and could give me a great reference.  So I of all people ended up working at a gynecologist office.  

At first I was in the front office.  Answer phones, take copays, greet patients, file medical records.  Within a few days, you’ve heard so much TMI over the phone, in person, and through labwork that your tolerance starts to build.  I just write down their verbatim complaint, file their herpes records, and try not to do too much visible wincing.  And I got really good at spelling gonorrhea.  It wasn’t that it was necessarily a bad job at that point; it just wasn’t the most pleasant topic in the world to think about as I was eating my peanut butter & jelly sandwich. 

Then one day the office manager tells me I’ve been promoted…it might have had something to do with another employee committing espionage, so there was an immediate vacancy.  The bribe was the promotion itself and a whole 25 cents more an hour.  Where was the promotion?  To the back office, of course.  Because doesn’t every person aspire to clean speculums, clean rooms, ask patients the List of Embarrassing Questions, talk about embarrassing problems, do urine tests on other people, and assist doctors by preparing tissue samples for the lab?  Ugh, I’d rather alphabetize things, thank you very much.  You can keep that quarter an hour. 

Of course I didn’t say that.  I said sure, and I got anointed the job of prepping patients for the nurse and doctor by taking as much off their plates as possible. That meant calling the patient when the back office was ready for her (often after a 45 minute stint in the waiting room), making small talk, weighing her and dealing with the resulting denial/embarrassment, taking her to a room and asking her the List of Embarrassing Questions while trying to build a non-judgmental rapport, making official notes of her answers, making private notes for the nurse and doctor, learning why she’s here that day, taking her blood pressure, tell her to take off her clothes, give her a gown, blah blah blah. 

I had to be a people person and get very personal answers out of women.  One of my first tasks was to weigh the woman, and it’s not like most women share their weight with other people.  I’d guess that most women don’t let anyone know that.  Within 5 minutes of meeting her, I knew one thing no one else knew.  Then I had to ask if she was sexually active.  If so, multiple partners?  What’s your method of birth control?  And on we continue to go down the List of Embarrassing Questions.  For the first week or two, I completely stumbled on the whole social script I was supposed to do.  It’s so awkward and scary, and I was waiting to be yelled at by the patient.  But no one yelled at me.  A few weeks in, I was interviewing a really nice lady, and she opened up, and we had a really nice conversation and the whole thing actually started to make sense.  I slowly got more confident.  I worked on my small talk script, I worked on varying my body language and how I asked questions, I developed a little comic routine for the scale, and I started to get into a groove.  With the vast majority of patients, I’d find at least 1 or 2 small ways to connect with them through the 10 minutes or so that I was with them.  It seemed to make them more comfortable, and then I felt even more at ease. 

I was there when women found out they were pregnant, when they found out their husband was cheating on them (because if you tell someone who thinks she’s in an exclusive relationship that she has gonorrhea, it probably isn’t an exclusive relationship), when they found out they had cancer, when they’re in labor, when they’re so run down by life they have nowhere else to turn.  Pivotal life moments. 

I worked in that back office for 7 months.  Did I like the job?  No, not really.  I had been put out of my comfort zone in so many ways.  I didn’t like medical stuff.  I didn’t really like being surrounded by women.  The things I had to do were really awkward, and sometimes I got a little nauseous dealing with all the ick.  In terms of liking a job, it had to be my least favorite job ever.

But do you know what?  Looking back, it was definitely a way that I needed to be pushed.  I learned so much about interacting with people, how to get people to talk with me, how to ask questions, and all sorts of random medical knowledge.  As I write this, I’m almost thinking that what would have been classified as my worst job ever may be one of my best jobs ever in terms of what I took on with me to the real world. 

 

Friday, October 22, 2010

10 year plan

I had to revise my money page up above.  I had written that we paid off our mortgage on the first house in 2005.  That was incorrect.  We actually paid it off in September, 2004.  Since we bought the house in April of 1999, this means we paid it off in 5.5 years.  We paid off $150,000 in 5.5 years.  And we didn't make that much of an income then.  We just lived very, very simply.  We contributed at least 10% of our income to our retirement plans back then, but of course we didn't come close to maxing them out at the time.  Our priority was definitely to pay off that mortgage during those 5.5 years.  And we did it.  In 1999 if you had told us that we were going to pay it off in 2004, we would have laughed and said that the only way that would happen is if we won the lottery. We didn't win the lottery, we didn't inherit any money, we just lived a lifestyle that was below our means to generate enough savings to put toward the house mortgage balance. 

So here we are in late 2010 with the dust starting to settle on our new house, after having done the major kitchen remodel, some bathroom remodeling, refinancing, and whatnot.  We have a mortgage again, and that does make me nervous.  I hate, hate, hate debt.  But it was a priority of ours to have a very nice house, and we did take advantage of the real estate bust to make it happen sooner rather than later.  That was the big battle in my head a year ago (do it now at a great price with a mortgage or wait longer and pay cash), and we decided to go for it.  Hence, the big downside is having a mortgage again.  A mortgage amount that is 40% higher than the mortgage in 1999 even.  We refinanced to a 15 year fixed rate mortgage, and that makes me feel better because at the latest it will be paid off before Julia starts college. 

The husband and I talked about the mortgage again this week since our refinancing went through last Friday.  What is a realistic but yet slightly ambitious goal for paying this off?  Times have changed a little because we have the big daycare expense that we didn't have in 1999.  The daycare expense will likely go down when Julia goes to kindergarten, but then we'll be paying for the half day of kindergarten that our taxes don't fund + possibly before school or after school care.  So our daycare bill will likely only go down slightly.  Starting in first grade, we'll only have before and/or after school care.  Probably starting in third-fourth grade, she probably won't need before and/or after school care.  (It depends on her maturity level.)  We max out our retirement accounts now, which we didn't do back in 1999.  We don't want to compromise that.  That should and will come before paying off our mortgage balance.

So we talked about it, and we came up with a 10 year figure.  10 years is a reasonable amount of time to pay this thing off.  We are already amortized to pay it off in 15 years, which results in substantially higher payments than if it was amortized over 30 years.  Based on my calculations, over the next 10 years we need to contribute $70,000 over and above our monthly payments to be mortgage free by the end of 2020.  That works out to $7,000 per year.  Hopefully that is do-able.  It should be do-able if neither of us loses our jobs for an extended amount of time. 

If we just pay our monthly payments, then we will be paying $69,500 in interest over the life of the loan.  If we prepay the $70,000, we will approximately be saving $20,000 in interest, bringing our total interest paid down to $50,000 over the life of the loan.

Paying the mortgage off in 10 years is a nice goal because Julia will not yet be technically a teenager, and we'll be in our low-mid 40s (cuz hubby's much, much older than me :0)  ).  By that point, maybe we'll be starting to get the itch to travel, and at that point Julia will be more independent and can withstand keeping up with us physically on excursions.  So then we can divert more money to travel and entertainment when we are completely and utterly debt free.

We both agreed to the plan, so now we have to come up with the extra $70,000.  Hmmmmm

I said at the beginning of October that our budget is tight this month because we had to pay for the second half of 2010 property taxes, and I wanted to see if we could do it without touching our savings.  So far, we're doing pretty well by just watching what we spend, and we don't need to touch our savings to make up the difference.  Yay!  November is going to be nice because we don't have our first mortgage payment until December (when you refinance in the middle of the month, you don't have your first payment until the month after your first complete month with the new bank).  So we're anticipated to have a surplus in November.  However, December will be nasty.  We have our 2011 homeowner association fees, we have an annual internet bill for all of 2011, we have car insurance due for the first half of 2011, and we have our 2011 homeowner insurance premium.  Oh yeah, and Christmas.  I'm projecting that we'll have to take $1,600 out of savings to take care of the increased December expenses.  My goal is to cut back spending in other areas over the next few months so that we end up taking less or maybe even NO money out of savings to accomplish this.  It would be most awesome if we can get through December without touching our savings.

For what it's worth, when I say savings, I mean an account that I have at ING Direct that is specifically designated for yearly expenses with timing issues (i.e., annual and semi-annual lump sum expenses).  My goal is for this account to always have at least $5,000 in cushion, and right now it is well above that.  This account is completely separate from our other savings accounts, which are actual savings accounts.  While the annual expense account is technically a savings account, it more or less operates like an escrow account would for your property taxes and insurance with your mortgage company.  But instead of the mortgage company controlling it, we control it.  Dave Ramsey would call this a sinking fund for our annual expenses if you're into his lingo.

I suppose I've blabbed enough about finances for the night.  Have a great weekend!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Kurt Cobain would roll over in his grave

Within iTunes, there's this neat feature where you can make a Genius Mix.  It will categorize your songs into six or so different categories. One of the categories it came up with for me is Grunge.  I did live in Seattle during the early 1990s, I owned at least 50 different flannel shirts and Doc Martens, but I really wasn't a grunge lover.  I usually favored hip hop and music with a beat.  I'm far more angsty now than I ever was as a teenager. 

So I was surprised when I got a Grunge category.  I was even more surprised when I saw what was in my Grunge category: Def Leppard, Journey, Heart, Poison?  POISON?  Glam 80s rock (Poison) could be mistaken for grunge?  Really?  I certainly think Def Leppard and Journey don't qualify as grunge either, but maybe they could stretch arena rock into grunge...somehow.  Heart? Well, those ladies were kind of pissed.

Maybe I am completely off base with my knowledge of grunge.  Flannel, Doc Martens, angst, Reality Bites, My So Called Life, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, no makeup, mosh pits... Maybe I missed the memo that Poison got nominated into the Grunge Hall of Fame.

Can you imagine what Kurt Cobain would think of being in the same category as Poison?

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

The Power of Shutting Up

There is a dichotomy to me.  There is probably more than one dichotomy, but for now I can only see one.  That would be that I'm much more opinionated on here and in my online life than I am in my real life.  In my real life, I'm paranoid that I'm going to offend everyone, so I tend to not say a whole lot.  Hence, the title of this blog.

In my online life, I spew like there's no tomorrow.

In my real life, I am the true quiet one.  Unless you've known me long enough to be able to read me, you might think I don't even think.  That's okay, I don't mind.  The more you get to know me and if I like you, the more I will talk with you.  And you might even learn that I do think, albeit occasionally.  Being that I'm an awesome listener, you will likely talk about your problems or thoughts to me because of my reputation as not talking about anything with anyone.  And I will listen, and I will phrase suggestions subtly.  Occasionally people will be so bold as to ask for my opinions, and depending on how well I know them, I'll give them sterilized or unsterilized opinions.  It always makes me feel good when people at least think about what I tell them I see from my perspective, or if what I say causes them to reflect on themselves in some way.  I don't have all the answers, but I think I look at a problem with enough perspective to at least provide a little more insight than the loathsome and unhelpful, "Hang in there."  If I ever say that to you, it means you're so beyond hope in my book that I have given up on you.  But it's written in socially acceptable code that most people would never, ever pick up on...unless you really know me.

There comes a time when you feel that you've built up a rapport with someone, which may or may not be the case from the other person's perspective.  And the other person just doesn't get it what you're trying to impart.  At all.  Despite many attempts.  So instead of continuing to waste the energy, you just have to shut up and cover your eyes as the train wreck gets closer and closer.

Dealing with this issue as Julia grows older is going to suck.  I hate being forced to watch train wrecks.  I like preventing them.  But for some people that's the only way they'll learn.  Then there are others who don't even learn from their train wrecks.  I hope Julia is in the former group.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

It's a balmy 58 degrees

Hi!  How are you?  It feels like it's been a while since I've written.  By all appearances, it just looks like I missed one day, but rather I've been posting entries ahead for the last week so I really haven't posted in a week.  Which is an eternity for me. 

I'm trying to become more of a chore task master (or mistress) around the house with myself.  A few weeks ago I came up with a chore list by week that gives some standardization and some flexibility.  It keeps me to task, and I need that because I can get sort of aimless when left to my own devices.  Part of the flexibility this week allowed me to focus on clearing out Julia's old stuff around the house.  One might have thought that looking at the clothes she wore when she was an infant would tug at the ol' heartstrings.  But nope.  Not one tear, a few memories, nothing wistful though.  So one child for me.  On Friday I got quizzed on my childbearing potential, and again I heard the, "You'll change your mind."  Uh huh, sure, please consult my track record for changing my mind. 

I turned on the furnace.  Blah, I hate spending money on heat.  I wish there was some way to preserve the excess heat from the steamy summer in some holding tank and release it when the colder months get here.  It was 54 degrees inside on Sunday morning.  We set the furnace to 58, and when it got to that temperature, Julia took off all her clothes and walked around naked for several hours.  Hmmmm... maybe she got my love of the cold.  I do not like the inside temperature to surpass 65 degrees, and I would never opt to even set the temperature that high into the 60s.  When we first lived together, this created huge thermostat arguments with the husband, who definitely liked his creature comforts.  Now the poor guy is used to a chilly house 8 months out of the year. 

I'm in a depressing patch of Dewey books.  It's called "The U.S. is going to hell in a handbasket" patch.  Books on the national deficit, outsourcing jobs to other countries, the evils of big box stores.  Depressing depressing depressing.  What makes no sense to me is that our country spends so much more than it takes in tax revenue.  People won't vote for new tax revenue, but they don't want services to be cut.  Something's got to give - cut spending, raise revenue, or a little of both!  Like most people who live in the general vicinity of big box stores, I tend to use them.  I don't go to W a l-M a r t, but for some reason I've justified in my head that the other big box stores are okay.  Yeah, W a l-M a r t IS really, really evil with their business practices, including strongarming vendors into submission.  The other big box stores are evil too though.  I want to spend less at them, but the thing is that I don't know where else to go.  Let's say I need dental floss.  I would go to T a r g e t to get it, along with the five other miscellaneous things on my shopping list because it's convenient to shop at one store and I know I'm getting it for a decent price.  So where else could I get my dental floss?  A grocery store (most of which are also big chains) or...?  I'm basically only left with big box stores.  If I wanted to buy local, I'm hard-pressed to even do that.  Depressing.


 

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Sixth Batch of Dewey Entires

Other than Other People's Love Letters, this batch of books wasn't terribly exciting or even interesting.


Making My Way Through Dewey

00_
011.73      Pearl, Nancy.  Book Lust.
02_
031.02        Frauenfelder, Mark.  The World's Worst.
04_
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081               Rakoff, David. Don't Get Too Comfortable.
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133        Horn, Stacy.  Unbelievable.
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153.83   Welch, Suzy.  10-10-10.
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177.7    Stone, Deborah.  The Samaritan's Dilemma.
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248.845             Neumann, Connie. Parenting in the Home Stretch.
255.1                Okholm, Dennis.  Monk Habits for Everyday People.
261.850973     Zacharias, Karen Spears. Will Jesus Buy Me a Double-Wide?
277.3083         Meyers, Robin.  Why the Christian Right Is Wrong.
289.3082          Solomon, Dorothy Allred.  The Sisterhood.
299.94               Russo, Steve.  What's the Deal with Wicca?
302.34082           Paul, Marla.  The Friendship Crisis.
305.4092             Merrill, Wendy.  Falling into Manholes.
310                      Statistical Abstract of the United States: 2009.
327.73009            Dobbs, Lou. Exporting America.
332.02401            Epperson, Sharon.  The Big Payoff.
343.730523         Lange, James. Retire Secure.
352.480973        Rivlin, Alice and Isabel Sawhill. Restoring Fiscal Sanity.
362.196852        Schaefer, Jenni.  Goodbye Ed, Hello Me.
378.19822           Peril, Lynn.  College Girls.
38_
392.6                  Shapiro, Bill.  Other People's Love Letters.
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608    Cooper, Christopher.  Patently Absurd.
612     McCardle, William D, Frank I. Katch, Victor L. Katch.  Essentials of Exercise Physiology.
621.38456  Baig, Edward C.  iPhone for Dummies.
636.7527  Koontz, Dean.  A Big Little Life: A Memoir of a Joyful Dog.
641.58      Hall, Dawn.  Busy People's Slow Cooker Cookbook.
658.812     Price, Bill and David Jaffe.  The Best Service Is No Service.   
663.61      Gleick, Peter H. Bottled & Sold: The Story Behind Our Obsession with Bottled Water.
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750.11        Richardson, Joy.  Looking at Pictures.
76_
771.33         Revell, Jeff.  Nikon D5000: From Snapshots to Great Shots.
782.421649  McQuillar, Tayannah Lee.  When Rap Music Had a Conscience.  
794.000     Orbanes, Philip E. Monopoly: The World's Most Famous Game.
80_
817.000 Scottoline, Lisa. Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog.
828.92    Browning, Guy.  Never Hit a Jellyfish with a Spade.
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910.4     Leffel, Tim.  Make Your Travel Dollars Worth a Fortune.
92_
937       Nardo, Don.  Life of a Roman Slave.
940.21   Netzley, Patricia D.  Life During the Renaissance.
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973.92      Strauss, William and Elaina Newport.  Sixteen Scandals.
98_
99_

How to Write a Love Letter

For the Dewey project, I read a book of love letters.  The book was composed of over a hundred different real-life love letters on different types of paper (note paper, post-its, napkins, e-mails, text messages, etc.).  It was so cool to see the scanned copy of the original love letter.  Some of the love letters I didn’t really think were love letters. Obviously the sender and recipient had some sort of relationship at some point, but some of them sounded more like casual notes or even hate letters.  

I’ll state the title and author of the book in my next Dewey entry, but I won’t here because I’m probably committing some kind of copyright violation by showing excerpts of the book.  But some things you actually have to see to understand. 

With no further ado, some examples from the book:



Cute method, but a love letter?

This counts as a love letter...?

Along the lines of the napkin...sorry for the fuzziness.  It is an interesting background if you could read it.

Seems more like a break-up letter to me




Now I’m not sure if I have an inordinate amount of love letters (and if you include the very broad definition of “love letters” that the book author uses, I have a buttload), or if I just kept a huge range of written correspondence instead of being picky.  I’m not sure how much the average person keeps.  I have about a 14 gallon full container after I condensed it this past spring.

I love, love, love written correspondence.  I enjoy seeing people’s handwriting.  I enjoy coming back to read their written word again and again and try to capture the feeling the author had at the time.  I like to take in the details like the type of paper, the way I’m addressed, whether the person crosses things out along the way.  I live for those sorts of nuances. 

Over the years, I dated guys who were very different from one another.  I wasn’t the type to date the same personality over and over.  Each was incredibly different, and therefore each relationship was totally different.  There was one I had no written correspondence with.  He’s easy to lose sight of based on my container of written correspondence because there is absolutely no written evidence of him.  In fact, I only think he ever wrote down one thing for me ever, and at the time I never thought to keep it, not knowing it would be the only tangible reminder of him.  Him and I really only interacted in person and on the phone.  Then there’s one who I have one piece of paper as a reminder along with a few printed out e-mails.  He’s easy to lose sight of too if it wasn’t for my memory. 

My first boyfriend was quite a prolific writer.  He takes up a lot of space in my box.  He was the brooding, tortured soul type.  He admitted upfront that he was a better writer than he was an in-person communicator.  His letters and cards were very nice, but they never resonated well to me.  He would say that he loved me “more than anything” after only having dated for two months.  His love letters really never talked about WHY he supposedly loved me so much; they just professed this undying love.  Which of course ended up dying, so I should just throw all of them away on the false premise. It may sound like I’m bitter, but it’s more that I’m annoyed at people who make grand claims about all of eternity when they don’t know what the next month will bring. It seems really disingenuous. 

After the first boyfriend, second place for most correspondence goes to a college boyfriend.  We had one very wonderful summer that somehow got elongated into dating a year after that.  He’s a dear person, I still am good friends with him today, but really we should never have dated.  We should have just kept our one summer as a special moment in time.  But no, live and learn.  When I think of our correspondence that I kept, I just sigh.  We were on two very different wavelengths and always will be, and it comes across in all that correspondence.

Then there’s assorted jumbles of correspondence along the way from friends, people I didn’t date very long, and of course I had to keep some Paul correspondence – particularly the time he sent me a love note and a hate note in the same week. 

My husband gets his own box within the container, and of course I kept the most from him.  What I appreciate immensely in the correspondence from him is that he always emphasizes what he likes about ME.  In contrast, many of them just talked about a general love, which doesn’t resonate well with me.  It feels good to know why he loves ME versus the other billions of people in the world. 

From the book I read, here’s a sample of a love letter that is comparable to one my husband would have written.  Again, it resonates because it’s about the person and not a vague sentiment that could be copied and sent to any number of people. Not that anyone would ever do that, right?  I also like that he stated the obvious in the first line.  Direct, to the point, my kind of guy.  
Primo example of love letter from book, at least in my estimation.  Or maybe I just like him because he likes naps.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

First Handwritten Entry

Here's my first attempt at a handwritten blog entry for this blog.  Tip to self: next time use lined paper.


Friday, October 15, 2010

Eat a whole cow or something like that

Tuesday was a bit odd because I unintentionally ate a lot of protein.  I ate 26 grams at breakfast, and then I ate a ton for lunch as well.  And guess what?  I didn't eat as much that day.  Go figure. 

Typically I just go from empty carb to empty carb all day long.  Add some protein in for a change, and it's like my body isn't as hungry as usual. 

Then I decided to look up how much protein I should be eating because one can likely infer that I normally don't get enough protein due to my love of carbs.  I seem to come up with a range of 60-140 grams per day from various internet sources.  Some sources cite a lower amount than others.  So I thought a good compromise might be to split the difference and aim for 100 grams of protein a day. 

Obviously the counting calories thing isn't working very well.  I have 10-15 pounds I want to lose (depending on the day), and I've been trying to lose these same pounds for, hmmmm, forever.  If I can just keep my protein intake high enough that perhaps I don't do empty calorie snacking, then that might be the long-term solution.  The theory being that if I have high protein foods throughout the day, I may not get so hungry and then make unwise choices.  Let's keep myself feeling full through protein instead.  I wouldn't mind eating more protein, but it tends to be harder to prepare than, oh say, Skittles.

I'm not forgetting the other side of the equation.  I do exercise.  I've been running this month, walking normally, I do aerobics/Pilates/toning exercises.  But there's really only so much I can burn in the 1-2 free hours I have a day.  As I've learned with various food/exercise experiments, limiting the food intake is where the magic happens for me. 

100 grams of protein a day = better go shopping for some high protein food. Oh, and I'm NOT doing supplements and protein powder and any of that.  I want to go for the more natural sources and learn how to maintain a higher protein level through eating for the long-term.  This will be a challenge since I'm not a meat fan. 

Back when I was pregnant, I'd eat chicken for breakfast all the time.  I woke up craving chicken, which was kind of weird.  And since cooking chicken takes forever at 7am, I would end up just buying a huge bag of chicken nuggets (I know, not the best source of chicken) and eat a buttload of chicken nuggets for breakfast.  I usually ate 15-20 chicken nuggets for breakfast.  Then for lunch I'd eat 3 beef tacos.  WTH?  I don't eat beef usually.  Hmmm... it was probably my body's way of demanding more protein at the time.  Probably wouldn't hurt to up the level now as well.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Everything

If you add up all the time I've been single and unattached since I was 15 years old, you come up with 4-6 months, depending on how you define single and unattached.  And those weren't 4-6 continuous months; it was more like 2 weeks here, 1 month there, that sort of thing.  Sheesh, that's not a lot of time.  I think I've earned a doctorate in serial monogamy at that rate.

One thing that I missed out on was dating.  I never really did the dating thing.  I always did the friend evolving into something more thing, so if you get technical, the last real date I had was back when this was popular: 

flannel my so called life Pictures, Images and Photos

(By the way, did you know that my husband has a postcard handwritten by Claire Danes?)  Oh how I loved flannel.  I'm so jazzed that it's back in style.

Because I never got to experience the dating thing more than 2-3 times, I suppose I'm a little wistful about it.   It's probably just a grass is greener sort of thing; it sounds like so much FUN!  Meeting new people, seeing if you have chemistry with someone, the thrill of what is going to happen on your dates, seeing how it progresses, etc.

Right now I know quite a few single people, and I'm living vicariously through all of their experiences.  Their lives are so interesting.  I talk to them on a Monday, and they went out on one date.  By Thursday they've gone out with another person, and by Sunday they're steadily dating.  They experience more change in one week than I experience in, say, a decade.

The vast majority of them are actually quite discouraged about the whole process of dating.  Then there's me, trying to give encouragement and being about 200% more excited than they are about the process. 

After bantering with one of these people about unsuccessful attempts at dating, she said that I had 'everything.'  Well, I love my husband, and I love my daughter.  And I have a house and a car and a job.  But is that everything?  Apparently from her perspective, it is. 

From my perspective, I really like my life. I just missed out on the whole dating thing, and I relish hearing all about it.  It's not that I want to date anyone myself because I love my husband.  I just like to hear about other people's experiences.

When you get married, there's an aspect of your freedom that gets taken away.  For me, I didn't lose much freedom upon marriage.  My husband isn't one of those controlling types, so I still went out with friends whenever I wanted to once I was married.  Now that I have a child, a bit more freedom is gone.  Actually, a lot more freedom is gone.  Back in the day, we could take an impromptu weekend getaway.  Now we can't.  I can still go out, and my husband is willing to take father duty.  One problem with that is that I like going out WITH my husband.  But now it's more that if I go out, I leave the house without him at 8pm when my daughter goes to bed.  I roll home at midnight or 1am, and then it takes me a couple of hours to wind down.  I end up going to sleep at 3am, and then my daughter's up by 7am.  Since hubby was with her the previous night, I feel like I have to do the morning shift with her.  Back in the day, I could just sleep til noon or whenever the next day after going out.  Now it's not like I have that freedom, so it's just simpler to stay home.  95% of the time I don't mind.  Occasionally, though, it would be nice to get out of the house.   Or just take that impromptu weekend getaway with the husband. 

But from the single friend's perspective, I suppose I do have what she wants: devoted husband, stability, and all that.  So she can't see why I'm excited about her prospect of dating drudgery that seemingly results in dissatisfaction, and I can't understand why she thinks I have everything.