Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Just a bowl of ice cream please

I don't like Mother's Day.

I've never liked Mother's Day, but I don't think you can say unless you're a mother. It is now my right to say that I don't like Mother's Day. Why?

It's another of those Hallmark holidays that tries to sum up a whole year of appreciation into one day. It's just like Valentine's Day - another mindless day to get you to shell out money on flowers and/or candy. My theory is that if you're a good partner, your partner will appreciate you all year long through nice words and gestures. It's the simple things, like getting you a bowl of ice cream after a rough day or listening to you babble for an hour about the stupid stuff that happens at work. Being told on February 14th that I'm supposed to show my love by taking my partner out and buying a red negligee just seems....stupid. Although he might like the red negligee, particularly if I lose 30 lbs....but I digress.

The same thing goes for Mother's Day. If I'm a good mother, my child will want to spend time with me, give me unsolicited hugs, and make me artwork in school. Those are my rewards sprinkled throughout the year. Yes, there will be tough times when she's a tween and teenager that those rewards will be few and far between. But if I do my job right, she may scoop me out a bowl of ice cream once in a while even when she's a teenager. (Do you see a theme on how I like to receive my gestures of love???)

Being told that everyone is supposed to give their mother flowers and/or jewelry on the second Sunday in May is kinda stupid. I don't know about you, but I'd rather my kid pick me flowers on some random day and bring them to me. Or draw me a picture at school. That shows that my child appreciates and loves me without there being any obligation attached.

Perhaps I stumbled on my real issue with Mother's Day. Obligation. S and I have sorted out the Valentine's Day nonsense as pure nonsense. But our mothers (particularly his) tend to think that your love = how much you spend on Mother's Day. And now the ante is upped with Miss J. So now it's a card from us and a card from Miss J for each mother plus gifts. And some of us (i.e., me) forgot about Mother's Day until this past weekend. So it was urgent shopping and gift planning given that we have to get things in the mail.

Miss J, please know that your mother thinks Mother's Day is completely stupid. However, if you actually like me when you're older, you're more than welcome to scoop me a bowl of ice cream ANYTIME, not just the second Sunday in May.

6 comments:

Marie Tere said...

How many times did you type stupid in this post? Hmmm?

Did you loved ones scoop you ice cream tonight? Rumor has it S was scoopin' himself some :)

Leigh Ann said...

Have you ever heard of a book called The 5 Love Languages(or something close to that)? Well, it says that we all show love in different ways...5 according to the book. My love language is a toss up between Acts of Service and Quality Time. In other words, if you want to impress me and show that you love me....take your time and either spend it with me or do something for me. If someone took the time out of their schedule to do even the smallest of thing for me(like scooping a bowl of ice cream for me)...I would think they loved me forever! I don't need gifts! Especially don't waste your money on flowers or jewlery. I'm easy to please :0)

Leigh Ann said...

oh, and p.s. Homemade gifts(that someone took the time to make themselves) are the most expensive gifts in the world to me. They are worth FAR more to me than anything found in any store.

B said...

Marie, 'stupid' is a very big part of my vernacular. I know you don't like it, so I try to avoid it around you. And our favorite 17th century literature fan also uses 'stupid' quite a bit. And I scooped him 1 bowl of ice cream. He scooped himself the other bowl.

LA, I love that book. Not only are our kids twins, but so are we! Those are my high ones, and they are S's too. I love homemade gifts: candy, blankets, etc. We both scored 0 or 1 on gifts. Although I theoretically understand some people are high on gifts, I get turned off when the person calls you up to tell you what 'marvelous' gift they got. I think it's kind of tacky, but I have to remind myself they're just sharing their love language. And so I shop for them!

Scrapping in Circles said...

I too prefer acts of service for me over material gifts. If my husband changes the sheets on the bed, I know he really wanted me to feel loved. (By the way, I LOVE clean sheets. If I was rich, I'd have clean sheets every day.) (=

Marie Tere said...

No ice cream for you?

I have the book 5 Languages ... I should read it again, I liked it!

Yes, "stupid" was forbidden in my home growing up .... it must have carried over to my home now. The other word we don't say is "fat". My kids for years thought that WAS the "f" word :)