Wednesday, May 27, 2009

My Blog Compulsion: J & K

This Jon & Kate thing is soooo sad. I'm not sure why I dwell on it. I didn't even watch the show that much. There are so many elements to it - fame, greed, relationships, infertility, working on a marriage, extended family, The Golden Rule, and so on.

The timing of J & K is actually coincidentally very similar to S and me. They started dating in October of 1997, and so did we. We got engaged Dec. 23, 1998. They got engaged Dec. 25, 1998. Ah, but they have 8 kids, and we only have 1. They're famous, we aren't. Okay, our lives are very different, but at least the beginning of our relationship timeline is the same.

While you can find a whole truckload of information on them pretty much anywhere, one thing struck me that I haven't yet commented about:



In the clip above, which are compiled home movies and pictures, I loved how she twirled at Disney World on her honeymoon. Can you imagine her doing that NOW? That small moment clinched it for me that she has changed immensely. Question is: what was the cause of the big change? The kids? Jon? Fame? I have a gut feeling that it was the last one.

Do you know of the big rift between her and her family that caused them to become estranged? Her father had people in their church parish donate cribs for the 6 kids, but the cribs didn't match. She wanted matching cribs, and his stance was that if you were fortunate to get a crib from a well-intentioned stranger, then you had no right to complain that it didn't match. I'm sure that was just the straw that broke the camel's back in a long litany of individual instances. You can easily put aside a few individual instances as miscommunication or a bratty moment, but there are a considerable number of examples of Kate behavior that is unacceptable of a woman in her 30s.

This brings up a whole new line of thought. What happens if the person you marry changes significantly over time - so much so that they no longer resemble the person you married? Or perhaps you know of one big flaw in your spouse, but you put it aside because you love them, and then the flaw goes completely out of control?

I'm not saying she's the only one to blame. It takes two to make or dissolve a relationship.

It's all so sad. I feel for the little victims in all this. I wish J & K would take a serious look at what is best for the kids right now. Does that mean divorce? Who knows? It appears to me that Kate's priority is fame and being a celebrity. It appears to me that Jon's priority is finding himself and/or drowning his sorrows in vices.

1 comment:

Scrapping in Circles said...

I think they need to start with some counseling. That is always the best first step whenever a relationship has a problem (or many problems). Honestly, I think the counseling should have started long ago.

As for whose to blame...they both are and neither are. Just look at most celebrities...it's a difficult life. They want fame and the privileges that come with it, but they don't want to lose their privacy or be "used" by those around them. You can't have one without the other. On one hand, they needed the money so they could feed and clothe their children. Now, they probably could have quit the show if they hadn't become used to the extravagant lifestyle (Ann Taylor clothes, frequent spa visits, expensive hair styles, playing golf all the time, etc).

Kate claims they can't go back. I don't believe that. If they stopped the show, the public would move on within a year. They wouldn't be anymore well-known than any other couple with sextuplets who had done specials about their family (which is more than an "normal" family, but there wouldn't be paps everywhere they go).

I also don't watch their show very much, but I am interested in this family. I don't believe most of what I read. Her family (brother and his wife) seem to be out for the money too as they asked for money to speak out against them. The tabloids sensationalize everything and the TLC show wants drama. So, who knows how much is created with editing and script, how much is just made up, and how much is truth?

In the end, only Jon and Kate know the truth. If they were really committed to their marriage, as I would hope they are, they would seek counseling immediately. They'd stop doing the show (that's for the sake of the kids as well). They would just take time to get to know who they are all over again.