Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Day 17

Brisk 45 minute walk at lunch. That brings me to 490 minutes for February so far. That means I have 110 minutes to go in 11 days. Okay, so I will very likely hit that goal.

Yet it's intervention time. I keep eating! Sure, I get a reasonable amount of exercise in, but I eat way too many calories. Hence, I'm not losing (or maybe I'm gaining...). Every Friday morning I weigh in, and I say THIS week is going to be different. But it ends up not being any different by Friday afternoon.

Devil on my shoulder: I'm not THAT huge. Maybe that's why I keep sabotaging myself. I tell myself that a lot of people would love to be my weight, and if I can eat cookies and stay within 10 pounds of a 'healthy' weight, then so be it. Screw being a size 6, give me size 10/12 pants & give me that dang cookie. That cookie makes me feel good (temporarily).

Angel on my shoulder: Food is for sustenance. If I'm trying to heal emotional wounds with food, then I might need to look for other ways to heal myself. I do a reasonable job with exercise, so why ruin it with a despicable diet? I'm worth it!

My food life is a quick vacillation between the devil and the angel. Like today was 6 sugar cookies with frosting, a Kit Kat (fun size) & conversation hearts. But then I can eat 2 pounds of carrots in the same day. It's feast or famine. Today was a day of little protein. BAD! BAD!

1 comment:

Melissa said...

Yippee for hitting goal!
What about finding some lower calorie snack options like Skinny Cows or Vita Tops?