Zyrtec love/hate relationship

I had today off from work.  It was nice except for the 2.5 hour appointment.  Even that was productive, but it prevented me from being utterly lazy.  I read a book. I washed the two comforters on our bed (two separate loads of laundry).  Then I ate dinner in bed and proceeded to spill some lasagna on my newly white comforter.  Ah!  I hate when I am self-defeating like that.  However, my main reason for washing the comforter was because my allergies are in turbo high gear right now.  But still...grumble, grumble and stupid me for eating lasagna in bed.   And yes, I know it's karma's way of telling me I shouldn't be eating gluten and dairy.  Got that.

Zyrtec for me is a good and a bad.  Grass allergy season is awful.  Each year it seems to be getting worse. I'm not sure if my poor specimen of a body is deteriorating more each year, or if pollen is increasing each year, or a combination of the two.  All I know is that the sneezing, wheezing, and runny nose has been starting earlier, being more intense, and going longer each year.

If I don't take Zyrtec, I sneeze hundreds of times a day + my sinuses kill me + the attractive qualities of wheezing/runny nose + crankiness

If I take Zyrtec, I am comatose but have no symptoms.  Seriously, I slept 13 hours last night after popping that pill.  Last week I took Zyrtec and also slept 13 hours straight.  Right now it might just be a correlation, but the 13 hours of sleep in a row has eluded me for most of my adult life except when I take Zyrtec.  So I think it might be more than a correlation and likely causation.   

Having no symptoms is nice.  Really nice.  Yet 13 hours of sleep in a day is, umm... not quite feasible more than once or maybe twice a week.  Zyrtec-induced sleep is not a sleep that you wake up from and say, "Wow, that was the best sleep of my life!"  Rather, it's the type of sleep that you wake up from and say, "Did someone drug me with a roofie and take advantage of me and why is the room kind of fuzzy and why is my mouth so dry?"

One thing I learned as I pottered (the British version of putzed) around the house today.  The blue Victoria's Secret underwear I got EXACTLY MATCH the blue dress I got for the wedding. They are the exact same shade of blue (and it's a weird shade of blue too, so it's a cosmic feat of dye colors, I tell ya).  I'm not so Martha Stewart that I match my underwear to my clothes - just a weird coincidence.

I wish I had something profound today, but I've been trying to mentally work on my bridesmaid speech and that's been occupying my mental energy.  I'm not sure what the tone should be.  Should it be sappy?  I'm so bad at sappy.  I just can't do it, and when I try, it just comes out so fake.  I can do sarcastic, but that's probably not the right tone for a wedding.  So I'm thinking I should try sentimental.  However, sentimental can be a minefield with these two.




---> Stew spices
---> Secretary of State
---> Sunglasses at Night
---> Atari 2600
---> Twin Peaks
---> Underground tunnels
---> Masked Pen Bandit

Must not talk about above but how can I be sentimental?
Do you think they have canned bridesmaid speeches online? 


P.S. I hope Zyrtec (I mean whatever pharmaceutical company makes it) reads this and gives me a solution.

P.P.S. I'm editing this to say YES, they have bridesmaid speeches online.  Duh, of course they would.