Painting Like Bob Ross

I'm frustrated. 

The wedding is coming up, and I'm trying to figure out logistics like my hair.  Since the wedding starts at 10am (yes, A! M!), we have to leave our house by 8am.  I don't know any hair salons that open at 7am, sooooo.... that means I'm on my own as far as hair goes.  Or I can get my hair done the night before and sleep sitting up.  That doesn't sound all that comfortable. 

I am flying solo on hair, and don't forget the wedding is on the boat.  That means --> WIND!  Obviously the best solution would be to completely pull it back and hair spray the heck out of it til it's completely stiff. 

I've been watching Youtube videos on how to do an updo yourself.  Of course it looks easy in the video.  They make it completely easy, just like Bob Ross does on the Joy of Painting.  He paints his happy trees with such whimsy that you think, "Hey, this painting stuff is easy. Get me a canvas, a few oil paints (burnt sienna is a must), and I'll follow along with very hairy Bob with a soft-spoken voice and come out with a masterpiece."  Yeah, right.  Bob Ross was one of those guys that made painting look like riding a tricycle when in fact it's an art that few people have the talent to do.  Hair stylists are the same at creating updo masterpieces.  I cannot replicate their instructions in such a way that it even resembles something that isn't a tangled mess. 

I'll try a few more attempts before completely giving up on the updo; however, I'm going to need to have a back-up plan. My back-up plan is the hair style I'm semi-comfortable with: curling my hair, pulling half of it back and leaving half of it down. I like my hair down.  Having some it back will help ever so slightly with the wind factor. Of course, it will end up being more wind blown than the updo.  Balancing comfort with the wind is a hard juggling exercise.