Saturday, April 17, 2010

Morbid Thoughts

Here is my view from bed:

First of all, don't you like the paint job? Even if Cinnamon Toast isn't your favorite color, it's a heckuva lot better than the beat-up hospital green. When I was 8 years old, we moved into a house that had seafoam green in the dining room & I remember making that wincing expression even then when I saw it.

So the reason I took the picture was of the fan. There are 4 ceiling fans in this house, and oh how I dislike ceiling fans! It probably has to do with almost being decapitated by one that fell out of the ceiling and onto my head. Thankfully I heard it coming and only got dinged on the head instead of the decapitation. I ponder if that house would have sold if there had been brain and blood splattered all over the walls and carpet??? Wonderful thought, huh?

It is with trepidation that I will turn on the fan on the hot nights of summer. Even if this baby fell out of the ceiling, the worst that would happen is that my legs would be amputated. Amputation is better than decapitation, wouldn't you say? But I would be the one who's amputated, while my darling husband continues to sleep soundly next to me with his limbs intact.

Do you think he would be on to me if I asked him to switch sides on nights that the fan is on?

Why do I think this stuff? The house inspector said all of the fans were securely attached to the ceiling.

But still, when the time comes, I think I'm going to be hunting in the garage for the stand-up fan that blows horizontally. Morbid thoughts die hard, and I don't want my husband to have to clean up after my amputated legs. Aren't I thoughtful?

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