I've stated before that my 4-year old girl has selected a little Mean Girl as her main friend. Mean Girl will play with her one day, then tell my daughter "You're not my friend" the next day, which my daughter then repeats in various mean ways to other kids and my husband and me.
I figured out where Mean Girl gets it very early on. Her mother is very hot and cold. I've noticed this when I see her places around town. One day she'll chat with me for 15 minutes; the next time she'll ignore me. It's very much a mind game when you don't know where you stand with someone.
Mean Girl's mom has decided to put her little cherub in a private school with a pre-K program.
My daughter is devastated.
I am super joyous.
Mean Girl has been gone for over a month. There are almost daily iterations of, "I miss Mean Girl. When am I going to see Mean Girl?"
I think, ummmm never if we're lucky. I say, I can ask her mom if we can meet at the park.
And I actually did this; I'm not one of those mothers who tells my kid empty promises. Mean Girl's mother responded "sure" the first time. I asked for a specific date and then suggested a few dates, and she never responded. It's not like I expected her to, but I at least had to try for the sake of my begging daughter.
I'm not going to pester Mean Girl's mother. Obviously, Mean Girl has forgotten about Little J, or her mother wants to put the kibosh on it for some reason (probably because we're such riff raff that will be going to public school).
Regardless of the reason, Mean Girl continues to be out of our lives. And guess what? The "you're not my friend" crap has ceased. The mind games (a crushed little girl whose friend wouldn't play with her that day) have ceased.
Little J still talks about Mean Girl. Hopefully, it will fade over time. I'm not sure why J doesn't have those connections with the other kids at school. She talks about the other kids, she plays with the other kids, but she's not that passionate about any of the other kids as more than a temporary playmate for a few minutes.
I'm worried that she'll latch on to another Mean Girl the moment the opportunity arises. But it's not my life; it's hers.