My husband's new job is celebrating an awesome 3rd quarter by putting on a cocktail party.
Personally if I worked for a for-profit, I'd want a cash bonus. But instead they do rah rah things like cocktail parties with valet service after a good quarter. (See, I can complain about ANYthing.)
Why it makes me cranky:
1. It's on a Friday night. Friday nights are my night to change into fleece when I get home, read US Weekly & watch a movie.
2. I have to get out of my fleece and put on a stupid cocktail dress.
I know his company is rah rah (kind of like a high school pep assembly that's aged 20 years), and I know it's kind of expected that he (and I) show up. So we will.
Enter Dressamaggedon 2012. What do I WEAR to a cocktail party??? My willingness to spend money on a dress is pretty much nil. My willingness to go through trying on dresses is nil. Therefore, I commenced closet destruction in search of a dress, any dress, to wear to this thing.
Contender A: The dress I wore last year to the wedding. It's a bit...warm weather, but it's a really pretty blue.
Contender B: Basic black dress, sleeveless. It's a little big. Safety pins will be required.
Contender C: Ohmygod, my Homecoming dress from when I was 16 fits!!!! See, I told you I don't weigh that much more than I did in high school. Potential objections: 1) Are you allowed to wear a dress that you wore to an event with a different guy? 2) The dress is kind of funky. Timeless - it is NOT. I wore it in 1994, and multicolored dresses were fashionable. What WAS I thinking???
I did go to a store and look for a dress. I hate trying dresses on because either my boobs fit but the rest of the dress is a sack, or the bottom fits and my boobs are exploding. It's really discouraging. Unsurprisingly, I didn't find anything during my search.
I'm thinking Contender B. Basic, fade into the wall black with a black scarf. Simple, and I won't end up in the "she wore WHAT?!" highlight reel the next week.