Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Broken up for now

I think I forgot to report a stunning update back at the end of Dec/early January. "Stunning" is in the eye of the beholder, and since I forgot for over a month, it certainly is "stunning."

Remember that woman that S's cousin was dating? They went on some cruise back in 2010 with a guy friend of theirs, and we met up at a restaurant while they were in Seattle? She reminded me of an even more obnoxious Kate Gosselin with her hair all wonky and sticking up in the back. Of note during our restaurant outing, she was rude to staff, annoying, didn't listen, bragged about all the concerts she's gone to and complained about the cruise she was just on, alienated my husband, and even exceeded my (now ex) sister-in-law in the complaining/whining/entitled department. It was a painful experience. Her attitude and way of presenting herself did remind me of my stepaunt back east - brash, Italian, in-your-face, so maybe it was a regional thing???  I wasn't terribly impressed with the cousin that I had never met before that day, but he was definitely lower key than she was and that made him infinitely more tolerable.

After she got back to Jersey, she Facebooked us all, to my husband's and my disdain/partial amusement, depending on the day. I suppose she has some merits. She made up very pretty invitations to her boyfriend's 40th birthday party. It was nice to invite us, but it is a bit presumptuous to think we'd fly across the country for a birthday party. Ummm, she doesn't work, so she has plenty of time to be with her boyfriend and make pretty invitations to his birthday party. (She's 40 years old, and I do think it's odd that at 40 years old you've never been married after wanting to be married your whole life and you don't have a job either....but that's just me.)

Since I didn't like her, everything she did annoyed me. Such as sending Christmas cards from her, cousin, and cousin's two kids. I thought it was a bit presumptuous. Then she'd post articles about how wonderful mothers of autistic kids are. I of course find fault with this because she's NOT a mother to an autistic kid. She's the girlfriend of a guy who's a father of an autistic kid. Maybe several years down the road if they are married and the real mother is out of the picture, then I think there's room for interpretation on being a mother. But the real mother is in the picture and she's only the girlfriend.

Then she would always post passive aggressive things about her lackluster boyfriend. Basically it would be these "go girl" quotes about if someone doesn't appreciate you, you might have to walk out of his life for him to finally appreciate you. Or one time he stood her up, and the subsequent argument happened via Facebook. If she wasn't posting passive aggressive things about S's cousin, she was talking about missing her daddy. He had died several years ago, and she still posts quite a bit about missing him. I know we all experience grief differently. But as someone who has also lost her dad, I think it's a bit melodramatic to post lots of things about your dad to invoke sympathy from people. I suppose that's the issue. Everything she posts tries to invoke sympathy - either with her boyfriend issues or with her dad. She needs constant support and validation, which to me is the definition of someone being high maintenance.

So, anyway, on New Year's Eve cousin broke up with her and kicked her out of his house (the house that is being foreclosed on, but that's another sigh-inducing part of the story). Of course, his mother was elated, and it quickly made the family gossip circle. At first I wondered how much they were really broken up. Like if he told his mom they were broken up so that he wouldn't be cut off (his mom is still supporting him...ummm yeah, yet another sigh-inducing part of the story), but he didn't actually tell the girlfriend. Or maybe she wouldn't take the hint. Fortunately, apparently it was true.

Then the Facebook statuses started. The "go girl" anthem of how he's lost a wonderful woman ad nauseum. Because, as we all know, if you have to tell the world you're wonderful that means you really are wonderful and not completely insecure and without any marketable skills to boot. That was her main tactic for a few weeks.

Now she's started a new tactic. She's now, I suppose, trying to prove how much she cares for his family (although I don't know if that was an issue he had with her). She's posting all this stuff about supporting autism, and now she's "liking" all my statuses and pictures, as well as my ex sister-in-law's (who she probably doesn't know is an ex). After a year and a half of not paying us any attention, which I was not heartbroken about, she's trying to be uber involved and like we're all chummy. I honestly think this is her new tactic to get back into good graces with her ex-boyfriend along with posting about autism research.

I have no stake in this whole drama. I suppose my biggest stake in this is that I really don't want to go to New Jersey for a wedding of a person I can't stand. Other than that, I really don't care what happens as long as my interaction is limited to Facebook voyeurism.


Jesse said...

Well, if you do have to come to New Jersey, at least you'll get to check out two things:

1. The world capital of holier-than-thou intellectual snobbery and breeding ground of the evil 1%, Princeton University.

2. The world capital of grime, rudeness, and "we're the center of the world" snobbery, New York.

Once you've done this, you'll be even more thankful to be living where you live.

B said...

There have been a few conferences in NYC, but I've always chosen to pass on them due to the locale. NYC seems too loud and crowded and fake for me.

I haven't heard a whole lot about New Jersey. I know they have high taxes (which isn't necessarily a bad thing) and something about being a toxic mess although I've never gotten more elaboration.

When I do go, I do have a short itinerary of things to do:

- ESB in NYC
- Broadway play
- Walk around NYC aimlessly for a few hours
- Stay a few days in Sayreville, NJ just because it seems like a cool place.
- The Jersey shore (not due to the TV show that I've never seen, just because I've heard so much about it)

I'll add Princeton to the list. Maybe I can wander around until I find a preppy looking guy with a Range Rover (that will be a short visit!).