Sunday, December 11, 2011

Non-breakfast foods

The world discriminates against anti-breakfast food people.

On Friday I flew across the state and back on the same day. I was up sinfully early at 3:30am after going to bed at midnight. When one wakes up at that godforsaken time, let's just say your first thought isn't, "What's for breakfast?" Your first thought is, "I wanna go back to bed and NOW."

I dutifully tried to take breakfast with me to the airport, knowing that I'd eventually be hungry. The problem? What is non-messy, portable (not needing dishware), and doesn't need reheating? (I tend not to like granola/cereal bars and they have gluten in them anyway.)  I ended up taking an apple and 10 almonds.

By the time I drove to the airport, parked, and got through security, I was famished. This usually happens to me; 1.5 - 2 hours after I wake up, I'm very much like "Feed me!" I demolished the apple and 10 almonds very quickly, and I was still hungry.  Then I decided to pick up something at the many places to eat at the airport.

I know I'm a picky-ish eater. I don't like eggs, I don't like most breakfast meats (bacon, ham, sausage), I should stay away from gluten pastries, I don't like coffee.

My first preference was Qdoba. Mexican burrito place like Chipotle. I practically run up there because it's OPEN! A yummy chicken, rice, cheese/sour cream burrito! But wait, they're ONLY serving breakfast burritos. Eggs, some pork meat item (no chicken this early), sour cream/cheese all wrapped up in a tortilla. But if I got one, I'd only end up with sour cream and cheese wrapped up in the tortilla since I don't "do" eggs or that meat. Fail. I asked about something else, and I was told no.

Then I go to the next option: Wendy's. Egg biscuit sandwiches, coffee, pastries. Eh, no thanks.

I even check out the Japanese food kiosk. Maybe I could get some teriyaki chicken. Umm, nope.

Then I see Ivar's (fish) is open. I could eat some fish and fries. Oh, silly me, they have a "special" breakfast menu. Maybe it would include clam chowder then? Nope. It's more egg biscuit sandwiches.

Why is there only 1 sanctioned breakfast meal served at the airport?

Who has determined that eggs and pork on a biscuit (Mexican version: wrapped in a tortilla) is the only acceptable form of breakfast? 

Why can we not eat anything else between 4am - 10am/11am at the airport?

At this point, I've given up hope. I will just have to have a rumbling stomach during the whole plane ride and chance passing out from being famished (don't you love when I get all dramatic???). I decided to walk the terminal a little more before my flight, and I spotted a Quizno's. I saw their big sign about breakfast. As you might imagine, eggs and breakfast pork on a sub. I go in and look desperate. "Is there any way I can get something else other than the breakfast subs? Pleasssssssse?"  She said they had salads. Salad! Yes!!!!!! 

I gleefully ate a chicken caesar salad at the gate, extremely happy that I figured out a way to get non-standard breakfast food at the airport.

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